Friday, June 15, 2012

A Personal Ad as an Act of Public Service

Continuing my series on analyzing personal ads from Craigslist, here is an interesting ad that actually gives helpful tips to clueless guys about what women want. Anything that helps in the understanding process (Mars, meet Venus) between the genders is a good thing.

I think I'm looking for the impossible - 28 (hillsboro)


Date: 2012-06-06, 12:14AM PDT


Hey looking for ltr or some thing more than fwb or booty call. I'm 5'5 please be taller than me. The taller the better. I'm no Barbie, but I'm not fat...maybe a lil chubby. Please be hwp, you don't have to have rippling muscles, don't mind a lil extra. I'm drug free and prefer you be also, alto I do smoke when drinking. I have two awesome kids, a job,a car, my own place. Please have the ability to communicate, not play games or have any drama. I'm very much a Jeans and t shirt kinda girl and have many hobbies....look forward to talking to you...if there is any one out there like I am describing....

Please change subject line so I know you are real... FAV movie or something:-)

1. For 99% of women its not how much you make but the fact that you work to make something.

2. Its not the price of the gift but the thought that went into it.

3. Take care of the little things...the rest will fall into place.

4. Never go a day without trying to make her laugh... No matter how bad things get if you can laugh at life then you already won.

5. Always try to be in the moment... If you keep thinking about what could be... you miss out on what is.

6. Women like to talk about there problems.. Men like to fix things. Don't...9 times out of 10 the girl knows what to do she just wants to vent. the job as men is to just shut the F&ck up and listen. sometimes with a woman, doing less means more. Doing absolutely nothing and just listening will get you farther than you think... (yes I know this goes against logic guys... you are logical creatures but women are emotional creatures.)

7. know that when a woman is done... she is done. When that switch turns off its off for good. Men can go back and forth... women don't. So don't let it ever get to that point. Just take care of her emotions and that switch will never turn off.

8. Learn how to cook... You will be amazed at the results you get. Heres a fact... ALL FOOD IS A APHRODISIAC IF YOU GET OFF YOUR ASS AND COOK FOR HER FOR ONCE!!! Lol

9. Jealousy never works... If your the one that takes care of us emotionally and are the one that is there for us when we need you... we could be in a room full of Chip & Dales and will be thinking of you. You ever see a hot woman with a average guy and think to yourself Why him? What does he have that you don't? Its not what he has but what he DOES! (Or maybe he can part his hair with his tongue) Lol... j/k

10. Last but not least... FOREPLAY FOREPLAY FOREPLAY!!! Lol... you don't get rewarded for how fast you do it. Quickies are great sometimes but DAMN... slow down and enjoy the moment. Take care of us first and I guarantee you that you will get yours. Here is a tip... If you don't know what turns a girl on... F&cking ask!!!

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These 10 tips for guys on how to treat a woman is definitely helpful and worth saving. However, she did not explain why women want tall men. She says that she's 5'5 and wants a tall guy, "the taller, the better." Why? The magic number in many ads seems to be 6'0". If you're beneath that, it's like many women have that sign from carnivals: "you must be at least this tall to ride." It is the sign of shame for many guys who aren't blessed enough to reach 6'0". To me, that seems to be a shallow requirement. A person has no control over the height they reached. Sure, diet may affect it somewhat. However, when I was at my grandmother's funeral in 2005, her husband and their five sons all stood in a line for a photograph. All of them were the same height (and I'm the same height as my dad and uncles). The officiating minister saw our cousin (who was adopted) and remarked, "I know who inherited the height in this family!" He had no idea that the cousin was adopted, but it caused laughter.

My roommate in D.C. and fellow BYU Washington Seminar intern Matt had a great girlfriend (they've been married for 12 years now) who told me that she almost did not date Matt because he wasn't tall enough. Matt is about the same height as me. He has a great personality and is a good looking guy. Several girls on the internship program had their eyes on him and his girlfriend made several trips from Utah to be with him in Washington, D.C. that semester (I suspected that she feared some other lady stealing him away, but from my end I saw a guy who was faithful and in love with only Anna. He did not seem to be aware that a few girls on the program were interested in him, including the professor's daughter who wanted me to divulge everything I knew about Matt). I asked Anna (Matt's wife) why height was so important to her. She said that she likes to "feel small", like he would be her protector. Sounds like the psychological concept of the Electra Complex (the female version of the Oedipus Complex). But at least she had the good sense to realize that a catch is a catch, despite her personal preferences. She was willing to overlook height because Matt had all the other qualities that she found attractive.

I do find it interesting that many women seem to have that 6'0" height requirement and yet they think it is "shallow" if a guy has a "weight requirement." Well, one can always lose the weight if they have enough willpower, but no one can grow any taller after they've reached their full growth. Which is more shallow? Dismissing a person for something that they cannot change or dismissing someone for something that they can change but refuse to?

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