Friday, June 08, 2012

Another Personal Ad


Partner in Mirth - 34 (PDX)


Date: 2012-06-02, 5:44PM PDT


I'm looking for something that generally happens naturally with acquaintances. It hasn't happened yet in "real life", so I'm casting my fishnets out so see if anyone here is in the same boat. I'd like to find someone in the upper echelon of attractiveness since I am up there too. I'm not a model, but I'm cute, thin, and take care of myself (I've seen the pics in the W4M section and I'm not in that category). Ideally you will have a bit of a messed up background, baggage or whatever that has planted a seed of sarcasm and skepticism in life. I want to find a man who will flip their middle finger at life with me, laugh about our past, and use our un-checked snarkiness to egg each other on.

No -- I am not bitter nor am I a pessimist. However, I have NO interested in getting a mani-pedis while eating bon-bons with my effeminate boyfriend. Talking, crying, desperately clinging to one another is not my deal. I'm much more about holding each other up while we bar-hop and try to talk the drunken locals into buying a spent lottery ticket. Then we can go outside and kick over all the hipsters' bikes.

Ideally, in the end, we will collapse together, our affection unexplainable because this isn't what one would call romance.

A little about me: educated, professional, responsible, loyal and caring. I have been married but I forgot to have kids. Music: very eclectic. I am not the type of person to like "a little of everything", when I like something, I buy the whole god damn discography. I have obsessed on: Depeche Mode (I grew up in the 80's, give me a break), Ween, Pink Floyd, Jonathan Coulton, Mason Jennings, Sarah Donner and the Pixies. I read mostly crap these days: Irish crime novels, David Sedaris (OK, he isn't crap), anything scary, and the Economist weekly (also not crap). I'm 5'4 and slightly below the ideal weight according to some site I just looked at.

A little about you: Smart (not smart with fixing cars, but smart with current events and how humans interact towards each other), attractive (weight is very important to me, you need not be skinny, but you must not be 20+ lbs overweight), sarcastic, have the balls to tease me and sometimes the public (in a non-dickish way), be past your past enough to laugh at it and not cry all the time, have funds available to go out on dates (I do not expect you to pay for me, but you better not expect me to pay for you), and if we examined you bit by bit, we'd find that you are actually a kind and thoughtful person despite all the cussing like a sailor.

If you are interested, (and how can you not be?) drop me a line and tell me something about yourself.

*Note: I will only reply if you state truthfully that you are between the ages of 30 and 42, you show at least a slight understanding of the English language, and you give me more than a 3 sentence reply to work with. Also, I'm serious about the attractiveness/weight thing.*

Now here's an example of a well-written ad. Her sense of humour comes out, she's got personality, and sounds like a winner. I really love her ad, but I did not respond to it because I'm likely not her type. Plus, the whole "snarkiness" might be fun for awhile, but at some point, there actually can be too much sarcasm and cynicism. From a spiritual mindset, it is actually not good to approach life from a cynical, snarky, sarcastic point of view. I'm guilty of a little bit of snark and sarcasm (oh my sardonic sense of humour!), but I also strive to be earnest and honest, giving benefits of the doubt and trying to look for the good / positive in others or in situations.

I thought it was especially funny that she had to "defend" her interest in Depeche Mode. Really? I did not realize that Depeche Mode was the subject to mockery. They had some good songs and albums in the 1980s. No defense needed. However, I do find that people often seem to be "cagey" when it comes to what kinds of music they will admit to listening to. I once communicated with a lady who would never give me specifics on what kinds of bands / artists she enjoyed listening to. She would only give me a radio station's call signal, which is meaningless to me. Why is music so defensive for people, particularly women? If people judge someone for the music they listen to, that's really pathetic. For me, I like knowing because if a woman prefers heavy metal / hard rock music, I know that a relationship is not going to work for us. But if women are diverse, with a wide spectrum, then it's okay. One of the joys in life when meeting new people is the introduction of favourite music to one another. Each of my friends have introduced me to great music I never heard before. Nathan probably has the closest music taste to me, of all my friendships.

But, this ad made me laugh. This is how you write a winning ad, people!

2 comments:

Mandalynn said...

I love reading the personal ads you come across and your take on them. Although, maybe you shouldn't discount some of them so readily. Taking a chance on someone I usually wouldn't have considered has totally worked out and changed my life. I want to slap myself when I think that I almost didn't pursue the relationship. Best of luck in the dating world. It's a tough world out there and we all need it!!

Sansego said...

Thanks for the comment, Mandy. I actually did respond to one ad that was pitch perfect. I wrote a lengthy response, but have not received a reply, which is usually the case. It's a frustrating exercise. A woman writes an ad that describes ME and when I respond, she can't even give me the courtesy of a reply.

If I don't hear from her, I will be posting the ad that inspired me to respond. Stay tuned!