Saturday, May 31, 2008

Open Letter to Scott McClellan

Dear Scott,

What the hell happened to you? Did you have an attack of conscience? Did someone put the fear of God into you? Did being a loyal Bushevik no longer pay off? Did the publishing industry of New York make a bargain with you that they'd only publish if you came clean about your role as Bush's propaganda minister? I mean, you titled your book "What Happened", so what the fuck happened anyway? Why turncoat now? Why did you wait so late? What would possess you to come clean with the truth after all these years? I mean, when you were ordered to pass on the official lie to the press corps in your official duties as the president's press propagandist, where was your conscience then?

Forgive me if I think this book is little more than an egotistical mea culpa in which you hope to redeem your piddling place in history. There is no doubt that you will go down as one of Bush's ineffective propagandists. There's no escaping culpability here. You are guilty by association with the worst band of thieves, liars, murderers, and plunderers this nation has ever seen. You are responsible for the lies that were passed around, for the smears against anyone who questioned the claims and anyone who disagreed with the views of this White House. I don't care if you got an attack of conscience when feeding your children breakfast and you realized what kind of country they'll inherit (actually, I say that without knowing if you even have children and what ages they might be). The fact remains, when America needed people who are loyal to the founding document...the U.S. stand up for the truth when it mattered the most, you failed to speak out and became a mouthpiece for a lie. Your loyalty to Bush was more important than American values, the truth, and people's lives.

Go ahead and cry. It's funny to watch the reactions of people like Cheney and Rove and Ari Fleischer...all claiming that your words don't reflect the man that they knew. Because you turned coat on them, you just lost friends among the people you served with for years. Do you expect to be embraced by the people you once lied to? You are a fool. Watch the film "Benedict Arnold." That man died a lonely death in England because he betrayed Washington and the Patriots while the Royalists in England never truly trusted him. That's what happens when you turn coat on people. No one likes you. The liars hate you for exposing their lies as one who was once a part of it. The people you lied to don't like you because your motives are questioned as to "why now?" Had you resigned at the first instance you were asked to lie, you might've gained respect. But when you wait to reveal the truth in a memoir, it's too late. Hell still has a room with your name on it. You might want to pack your bags for Baghdad to get used to the heat in your retirement years.

If you truly are remorseful, here are some things you can do for your country:

(1) Donate all proceeds from the sale of your book to veterans of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan;

(2) Speak at the Democratic National Convention about how you were conned by the lies of George W. Bush and reveal everything you know about John McCain.

(3) Tell us what the real relationship is between Bush and that gay escort James Guckert / Jeff Gannon, who posed as a reporter for an online journal to ask softball questions of the president.

(4) Serve in Iraq for the rest of your days on earth or until we leave Iraq, whichever comes first.

(5) Vote Democratic in the November election.

Failure to do any of these five things reveals that you are not serious about being remorseful over the part you played in carrying out the lies of this administration. You deserve no honour, no awards, no financial benefits for coming clean now. You are a despicable human being who I hope will go to your grave with a nagging guilty conscience for failing to speak out when it mattered most. The lives of over 4,000 Americans and hundreds of thousands of Iraqis are on your conscience. You cannot escape your role in this immoral war. Just as the Nazis had their propaganda minister who was charged with war crimes at Nuremberg, so are you just as guilty of war crimes.

If Bush never speaks to you again, even though you still admire him, I hope you understand why. He values loyalty and you just betrayed him for what benefit? Nothing you've written about is news. We all know he lied relentlessly and forgive my cynicism, but I just can't understand the timing of your mea culpa. Five years late doesn't bring back the dead.

The only thing I appreciate about this is seeing how rats abandon a sinking ship. I love seeing all these smug Busheviks scrambling over themselves to make sure history doesn't implicate them in the disaster that is Bush's administration. You know Rumsfeld's memoirs are going to be harsh on Bush and apparently Rove is having a hard time finding a publisher for his memoirs (who wants to read propaganda?). Earlier this year, Richard Perle (the neo-conservative architect of the war in Iraq) cried fowl because "Vanity Fair" had published an article in which even he was critical of Bush's competence regarding the war. After the level of nastiness shown towards those who were against the war in Iraq, it is a little satisfying to see conservatives jump all over themselves to condemn the Bush Administration. Yes, when ego and history are at play, no one wants to continue to dance on a sinking ship. It's every man for himself, Bush be damned.

With friends like you, Bush must be feeling betrayed, hurt, and shocked. He expected loyalty at all costs. What he didn't count on was the magic ability of New York publishing houses to offer enough money to make any loyalist turn coat. Thanks for the short thrill, but you're not excused from being a liar all these years. I really hope you will work on redeeming yourself in a more honest way...which is more than words. I want to see action, like helping Iraqi refugees or military veterans at home. Unless you do this, your words are hollow and vain. I'd hate to have a friend like you because friends are supposed to be honest and upfront with one another instead of enablers and true friends don't betray the relationship in a book for public consumption.

I honestly hope this is the last we'll see of the likes of you. You deserve to have a place next to Benedict Arnold in the history books, because you first betrayed America by enabling the liars, then you betrayed the people you were supposedly loyal to. How can anyone trust what you have to say? You are a poster boy for the worst kind of friend imagineable. Now go crawl back into your hole.

Don't know when this photo was taken, but it's interesting to see a sunny Scott walking next to his hero, a sour-faced Bush. Was something going on between them already when this photo was taken? Maybe Bush sensed a rat in his administration.

"What, me worry?"

Our beleagured president experiences another betrayal. I think we're only seeing the trickle before the dam finally breaks. I expect a tidal wave of anti-Bush books from his former administrative officials who have egos large enough to blame him in hopes of salvaging their reputations. The only loyal Bush books I can see will be written by Laura "He's misunderstood" Bush, Condoleezza "My husb--" Rice, Harriet "You're the best president ever, sir!" Miers, Karl "Can I suck your dick again, sir?" Rove and Dick "You're the Man!" Cheney.


Margie's Musings said...

Greed got the best of him, Nicholas. He saw all those book sales and he got honest. He is hoping to make his fortune being "honest". However, it's a little late, isn't it?

d/b/c/m said...

Whew! I hope I never get on your bad side.

I really like the real remorse requirements you gave him and I think you're right about that. Words come easy.

Sansego said...


Don't worry about that. I save my vitriol for hypocrites and outright liars. I base it on Jesus, who also was harsh on hypocrites and liars. It's the sanctimonious morality that covers up hypocrisy and lies that should anger anyone.

When I'm mad at friends, I'll tell them what's bothering me but I also let friends know that my friendship is without conditions and forever. I've only ended two friendships in my life and there were because of a serious character flaw that I couldn't accept...but I don't demonize them. I just accept that a friendship isn't possible.

But you don't have to worry about getting on my bad side...especially when I consider it to be an honour that you're friends with me!

d/b/c/m said...

thanks nick--it's nice to be reassured. i'm very thankful we're friends.